In this post Here my Sister and I discussed dating and the results of it...we asked if the pattern of "modern dating" (which is potentially defrauding and/or defiling) is God's plan?
If dating isn't God's plan, then how are we to find our marriage partner?
We believe that "Courtship" is the answer. Although every "courtship" is different, the intent is the same: To provide a relatively safe way to determine the suitability and qualities of a potential spouse. It provides a means where hearts can be protected, and emotional and moral purity can be preserved. Courtship looks different from family to family and couple to couple, but the idea and vision is the same: protection and purity.
The term "courtship" can be a rather generic term, covering a large continuum of practical out workings. Having never been in a courtship situation, we're not talking out of experience. It seems wise however, to be prepared ahead of time should you find yourself in a potential courtship situation. For example: It would be prudent to have a list of non-negotiables, strong preferences, and things to be flexible about. Also, form a plan with your parents on practical ways to protect your heart while evaluating a potential marriage partner.
For example:
- Not being alone with a young man (or woman)
- Treat them all as brothers in Christ (or sisters) because you don't know who's husband (or wife) they're going to be.
- This list is not exhaustive, be prayerful!
When God first created man, He said that it wasn't good for man to be alone, so he made a helper for them (Genesis 2:18).
If it's God's plan for you to marry, then He has already created a mate for you and He also has a plan for you to meet (so why play around with others, right?). It can be hard to trust God that everything will work out, and the patience for His plan to come to light is often short, but that is when real faith comes!
We need to be on our faces before God, begging Him to help us keep our heart, mind and body pure...we need to beg God to help our thoughts stay focused on HIM, but also, when the time comes that He would be purposeful and direct in bringing our spouse to us and give us peace.
There are a few questions that have been asked, and we will address those and any others on this subject in the next post!
7 comments:
I love these posts, Josh! I look forward to reading more! I love how you back things up with scripture, and you don't just post your opinion on things.
~Eldarwen Failariel~
Great post, Josh! I think courtship is the answer! It not only gives a young lady and a young man a chance to get to know each other well and grow in pure and holy love, but it also gives both of the families involved a chance to become good friends.
I agree that it is important to stay pure. The world has made sin easy(er) than ever before, so we need to be very careful!
Looking forward to hte next post!
Patrick
Great post, i've never really totally understood exactly what courtship is..so im looking forward to learning more from you and your sisters posts!
Amen! Very good post.
This is an important issue to cover. If you will be spending your lifetime with the one you marry, you want to make sure you know the person very well, and that you are like minded!
Again, great post.
Kelsey
Like I told your sister, I totally agree with you guys and have the same beliefs and convictions. You and your sister's blogs are my favorite to read. Than for sharing everything you do.
I just came from your sister's blog and I thought I'd tell you what I told her. :) I think more bloggers should write about purity on their blog more often! Glad you wrote this post - great job! I completely agree with you guys on courtship - that's the only way to go!
Blessings,
~Miss Raquel
P.S. In case you didn't notice when you were on my blog last...I added the "True Love Waits" ring picture to my sidebar. :) I told my Dad about how you have that up on your blog page and he really respects a guy for having it on his blog. :)
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